JANUARY 1996: Stepping out of Brisbane airport and into the hot, humid Queensland air.

JUNE 1997: Coming out to my mother on the phone.

FEBRUARY 1999: Waiting in the immigration queue after landing in Cairo and lighting up a cigarette.

MARCH 2003: Watching my first play being performed.

OCTOBER 2008: My partner telling me that he is HIV positive.

AUGUST 2009: Standing on Circular Quay in Sydney and knowing that I would live in that city one day.

FEBRUARY 2010: Seeing S. waiting for me at the airport in LA, wearing a new checkered shirt.

FEBRUARY 2010: Holding my first book in my hands at my publisher's office and thinking: I'll miss my train.

SEPTEMBER 2011: Giving S. his house key back and for a split second thinking he might hit me.

MAY 2012: Being woken up after the first night in the clinic and knowing that something had changed but not knowing what that was.